This post is about sharing my thoughts, and motivations circling around for a while now. It's time I just sit down and process them.
First I'll go over why I try to open commissions.
Supporting myself & family, while I get to do what I love.
& The further goal was to take some of those funds, and give it back to community by commissioning others.
Now the need to do: A lot of things...
One of them is marketing, obviously.
The other reasons are rather high standards I give myself, it's not simply "perfectionism".
Rather it's because I know the serious nature of freelancing.
Then there's also the current struggle with my art direction.
From the desire of support, I kept trying no matter what. Some say that "a little bit of delulu goes a long way", but honestly it's time I be true to myself.
I don't think I'm currently in a good position to make this happen. It's hard to have that honesty to myself, because it feels like I'm giving up these goals.
In reality, it's not. The world can make it feel like we don't have much time, but we do have time.
Why do I want to make art for others?
It's a fun way to go outside of my original work bubble once in a while!
I thrive from not feeling "stuck in one place", whether it's my own work or working on multiple projects at a time. I still like my work btw, am just a bit built different.
So, What's the current plan?
Temporarily discontinue developing comm services, possibly until 2027.
Move Halloween plans to future Trades & Requests.
Autumn & Winter as a time to chill, and casually do art.
Solo Projects: Celestine Cafe Artbook & Kindled Embers are still on indefinite hiatus in production.
As a current alternative to comms, I do have my KoFi open in case anyone wants to give a boost with support.
But note, there's ZERO obligation! Don't give if you're not in a good place to give.
Hopefully I do feel better eventually, now that I got this out of my chest.
Before I head off for now, I ask for no "words of affirmation" comments please.
As much it's appreciated, I feel it would derail this post's purpose. I really don't want sympathy, just understanding.
Please understand where am coming from with this request, thank you in advance! 🙏 ✨